We Are a Team

I have not done a very good job assigning chores etc for my kids since forever. I live by the motto of "it's easier if I just do it myself and it will get done the right way." Now that we are a blended household, I need to get everyone on the same page. I cannot do it all anymore and still have sanity. So I am going to give this pitch at dinner tonight and see if anyone can relate...

Ok team, and yes, I am calling us a team because we are all living under the same roof. We do not have to be related or married to be on the same team. We have to work together to make our home a pleasant and comfortable place to live. When you are on a soccer team (and yes, all 4 of you have played soccer before so you can relate to my examples), you work with your teammates. If someone misses a pass down the field, someone else jumps in and gets the ball. That person does not usually rip the player, who missed, a new one. That person also does not think twice about helping out a teammate. We need to be better about this because I see our team divided or actually in pieces.

Multiple choice questions:

"Hey team member A, could you please empty the dishwasher?"
a. Sure coach, just let me finish this sentence on my homework and I will be right in.
b. I did it last time it's team member C's turn.
c. I have too much homework, I am way too busy.
d. I'll do it later (which means never).

If you do not know, the correct answer is a. If a coach asked you to jump into the game, would you refuse him/her? Would you whine? Would you conveniently forget?


When you remove your dish from the table, do you
a. put it on the counter?
b. put it near the sink, but not in it?
c. in the sink, but not rinsed off?
d. dump your trash, rinse your plate and put it in the dishwasher?

Pick d? You are correct and the perfect team player. Would you enter a soccer game and kick the ball half way to your teammate? Would you throw in a ball to the other team? Soccer or any team sport skills can be applied to our household.


When you are looking for your sweatshirt and you find it in the dryer, do you
a. take out your sweatshirt and close the door leaving the laundry for the next person to fold?
b. empty laundry onto laundry table, take your sweatshirt and go?
c. empty laundry onto laundry table, fold the clothes and take your sweatshirt?
d. empty laundry onto laundry table, fold the clothes, put on your sweatshirt, put the wet clothes in the dryer and a new load in the wash?

Well I would be happy with c but if you did d you would probably be team captain or the coach.  I am not sure how many of you are willing to be captain of our team. Just know, d, is what the coaches do all the time and someday when you have your own team, you will do it too.

As your coaches, we need to do a better job training you ,our team, to be exceptional. We do not want a losing record. We need team work, no whiners and a positive team spirit. If you need help on a certain job, then ASK US. We are your coaches, we know how to teach you to be the best you can be.

Here is just one example (it just happens to be the most recent):

When asked to clean the "common room" upstairs, we were met with a 2 day resistance. This did not make your coaches happy. When there is arguing amongst the coaches, the team suffers. Finally the chosen team member  went upstairs to "clean" said room.

Chosen team member considered this clean:

One of the coaches went upstairs and took 7 minutes this morning and "re-cleaned". This, alone was found under the couch....

This is the coach's version of clean.

Perhaps the chosen team member has never known what this coach's version of "clean" meant. By using these pictures or by asking a coach to show him/her how to clean, this problem could have been taken care of in less than 15 minutes. However, because the chosen team member did not think that this was his/her mess, there was a lot of whining and "why me?" involved. If your coach asked you to take the ball down the field and score a goal, would you? Or would you whine and say" it's not my turn" or "why do you always ask me?"

On the soccer field, if you are not a team player, you have consequences. You might have to warm the bench or miss a few games. You might get a penalty. If you are not a team player in this house, you will be penalized. Perhaps no phone, no car, EXTRA chores.... Your coaches can be very creative in the consequence department.

So let's all put our hands in and give a commitment to work together. Yes, there will be bumps along the way, but as your coaches, we will do our best to make everything as fair and as smooth as possible. We really like winning and we hope you do, too!

Common Sense Technology

There has been a lot of talk lately on whether children under the age of 13 should be on Facebook. Also, should children have their own emails, computer, etc.. There is no right answer, but I will give you what has worked for us so far. (With technology, something that works today, may be old school tomorrow, just sayin'.)

Cellphones:
K got a cell phone in 5th grade. It was basic and the real reason that I got it for her was for her to be able to call me when she was done at the barn. She fondly remembers it as her "hippo", it sort of looked like one. What works for one, works for the other. B got her phone in 5th grade, but really did not use it too much.

Honestly, I don't know what we did before cellphones. P has not had a cell phone while she has lived with us and at times it is tricky. I have had to rely on K knowing some of P's friends to find out where and when she needed to be picked up. K and B both now have iPhones. They have locks on their phones which I do not know. Does this worry me? Yes. Do I wish I had made the rule of give me the lock number or no phone? Yes. If I had their code, would I spy on them by reading their texts? If their moods changed and something seemed off with them and they weren't talking about it, then yes. Is this like our parents reading our diaries when we were young, probably. Some might find this horribly wrong, I see it as safety first.

And the house rule is no cellphones at the dinner table.

Facebook: Both girls got Facebook accounts in 6th grade. The rule there was I had to know their password and be friends with them. This still is a rule today. I do not ask their friends to be friends with me, but if their friends ask, then I usually accept. I try to stay off of commenting all over their pages because that is "so uncool", but monitoring works for me.

Twitter: We all have twitter accounts. I had mine years before they got theirs. Twitter seems to be the big thing for high schoolers these days. Say what you have to in 140 characters. Soon kids will be talking out loud in code. One of my daughters' (freshman) friends said, "Ugh, your mom is following me on twitter. She is going to see me drunk tweeting." Heads up kids, whether we are friends or not, I can look you up and see your drunk tweets. Twitter is not very private.

Instagram: They have instagram accounts, I do not because they have iphones and I haven't been upgraded to one yet. One of these days I will get an iphone and when I do, I will be on Instagram too.

Tumblr: K has one, B thinks it's confusing. I do not have one. The only way I can see what K does on Tumblr is if she leaves it open on my laptop.

I am lucky that my girls are not into gaming sites. They never had Nintendo or DSs or hand held type gaming systems. We have never had a TV in the car, but sometimes on long trips I wish we had. However, we got by playing the license plate game or I Spy. I also had made them magnet boards to use in the car. Anyway, did this make them not like games? Or is it the fact that they are girls?  All I know is that killing zombies is of no interest to them.

Our computer has always been in the family room. My laptop is always around the couch. Things got tricky when the girls had ipods and could get internet on them. They were often in their rooms so I did not know what sites they were on. We definitely have an open stream of conversation and they know that they can come to me with anything.

One article I read today, talked about kids and porn on the internet(amongst all this other stuff). This is something I had not really thought about. I think it is more of a boy thing.... (I hope). All I remember is being in my middle school library and someone had Judy Blume's book Forever. There were some descriptive sex scenes in there that I remember us all giggling about. I am figuring that this type of thing is natural for kids and now instead of a book they have the entire internet which is a little scary.

Both girls are going to sleepover camps this summer. They are not allowed to bring their cellphones or computers. This thrills me to no end and paralyzes them. I am thrilled because they will be focused on camp activities, being outdoors, learning, laughing and meeting new friends. They will not be able to worry about who is dating whom, what so and so is wearing, what anyone did last night unless their friends write them a letter and mail it in a mailbox. Now THAT would be something!

Sometimes, the immediacy of everything is a little overwhelming. However, sticking our heads in the sand as adults is not the right thing to do. The internet, cell phones, etc are not going to go away. The best way to combat this is knowledge. Get on Facebook, talk to your children about what is OK and not OK to write, and try to stay one step ahead of them.

Also, it is good to torture them with a nature walk once in awhile.

Sundays in My City

Cape Cod was blessed with a very snowy day yesterday! Today we took advantage and went sledding. Can you ask for a better view from your sledding spot?

4 happy, tired girls!

Happy Sunday! Go Patriots!!!

Forgive Me, I Have Ignored.

Forgive me blog, for I have ignored you.

My actions of the past few weeks have been similar to that of a chicken running around with it's head cut off.

These actions, well mostly fun, have denied my readers an insight into my very exciting life while at the same time causing me stress whenever I ran by the computer to the next activity.

As penance, I will now give a visual/written summation of the past 2 weeks.

*William and Kate got married. I watched and cried and got meds for a sinus infection.

*My beautiful niece was baptised. She rocked the bonnet look while singing with the choir.

*The "after" luncheon where everyone let down their hair and played with ducks.

*Lisa and her husband went on a 2 week book tour of Australia. The grandparents and I held the household together like a glue stick.

*K turned 14, but that will have to be a whole'nother post.

*We crammed in a few pictures of the grandchildren at the beach so we could get a Mother's Day present for the grandparents.

*Cannot resist chubby feet pictures... especially sandy ones.

*Later that day we had a Kentucky Derby party at my parents' house where we made hats and fascinators!

*B and little dude's sister are rocking the look!

*Little dude even got into the action.

*3 lovely ladies in their derby finest :)

*For K's birthday, we got her tickets to go see Bruno Mars at Boston University. She brought a friend and B and I went, too. Luckily another mom in town got tickets too, so there were 8 of us all together! Other than getting home at 2am, it was a blast and I highly recommend him in concert!

These events along with the every day things like grocery shopping, laundry, work, jump rope, swim practice, horseback riding and the bake sale I ran this morning are the reason why I have avoided you, my dear blog.

Please, please forgive me.

Ugg

My girls want Uggs. They would probably sell the dog to get themselves each a pair. I cannot buy them for them due to financial reasons, but would I if I didn't have to worry about money? I have never worn a pair of Uggs, so I am not sure if there is some mystical feeling your feet get when wearing them, but crap they are expensive! 3 years ago, I found K a pair of purple Uggs at Marshals in her size for $50. I snapped these up and she loved them and wore them to death. It was before the Ugg craze, so she was fairly unique in owning them. Now, however, EVERYONE (that from my girls) has them. Of course there are fake Uggs out there that look the same, but are missing that little Ugg tag on the back. My girls have fake Uggs from Target. Oh the horrors! I have offered to put a little tag on the back for them, but they have adimantly denied the offer.

B slept over her BFF's house last night. Her BFF let her wear her Uggs around a bit. She loved them and these are B's words,
"my feet feel betrayed without Uggs".

Kids know how to go for the jugular. Still can't get them for them, but I am hoping summer comes quickly so they will be back into flip flops. I just hope Uggs don't start pushing their furry flip flops for summer.

Calm Before the Storm

I took this yesterday of B and my friend's 2 kids. They all look like they could come from the same family! Meanwhile, in front of them, the local Agway was rushing to bring all it's mums into shelter. Looks like we are going to have a lot of wind and rain for the next few days. This morning I will be baking, because what is a storm without yummy baked goods?

Soccer Season has Begun!

Soccer season is off to a great start! Finally a beautiful, sunny weekend to play! B rocks at the defense!

K is some midfield position that spends the entire game running. Ugh. Better her than me!

I am having fun with the picnik site. It is a fun place to go to if you want to doctor up your pictures!

Bloggin' Ease

Thank heavens for kids and their ideas for blogs. It's almost like I don't have to think of the topic anymore. Today, my nephew J, B and K played with the bunny from the barn. I think his name is Chocolate Chip, but for today it may as well been Scarlet O'Hara. K made sure to tell me that this might be blog worthy before they started. I had my camera at the ready!

Scarlet's house was a little small in the beginning, but was offering a lot more fresh air and grass than her regular homestead.

Scarlet got plenty of love along the building process.
Tara grew by leaps and bounds.
Here, Scarlet is enjoying the rec area. There is also a kitchen (complete with carrots), a bedroom a guard horse, a statue of a horse(evidently every "rich" bunny needs one) and a fire pit for bun-bun to stay warm.
Scarlet is stylin' in her new specs.

The other day, K, had to use "nature" to make a paint brush and paint so she could make some cave paintings at school.We picked some sweet (as in cool, I think they were poison-like so we didn't eat them) berries. She put on one of Daddy's gross fishing shirts and got busy!

Yeah, she's on the bathroom floor. Hope you can't see the dirt and grime.

The paintbrush was made of goat, horse and dog hair. Quite creative if I do say so myself. I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. LOL. 

Keep it up girls, mama needs more blogging material....

Car ride

I had to write down some of the priceless (blogging) matter that was said during our 5 hour car ride up north this week.

"Why didn't I bring a sponge?"B

"We look past color in this house."K

"I have a white belt in karate."B

"Mommy said my leg hairs are beautiful"B

"I want to visit the Great Canyon some day. Is it in Canada?"K

Evidently we look past weight, hair color, clothing, etc too because that became a popular quote. And yeah, the GRAND Canyon is in Arizona and I immediately bought a map and started playing the license plate game to figure out where the states were in our wonderful country. I should have been working on this years ago! Another car trip on Monday, I will have to bring my notepad and pen with me again!

North Conway, NH

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com
As you can see, a fun time had by most in North Conway. Got to put the kids to bed. Tomorrow C goes back to France. I will give you my thoughts on this and some quotes I heard during the car ride. Oy.

More Summer Fun

First things first, I apologize for not making the rounds of everyone's blogs as much as usual. I am an entertaining machine at the moment and fully plan on reading and commenting galore on your blogs once school starts Sept. 2!

Now for all of you that want to be my foreign exchange student next year, I am taking bids.

Here are some of the things we have done this week...
Heritage Museum and Gardens....
Plymouth Plantation....

"Mom, is he wearing underwear?""Mom, can we bring it home to put on the farm?"

Go Carts.... Remind me B can not get her license until she is 20.


Bumper boats.....The Chatham Fish Pier.....

OK, starting bids need to exceed the french exchange program weekly fee of $150. I think you will be surprised of my summary of this whole experience next week after C leaves. I have a few weddings this weekend, but then we are headed to the White Mountains for a few days. Hopefully we won't see a moose on the Kancamangus Highway!

Bake Off!

Today was a rainy day, so we decided to do a bake-off. If you can't go to the beach, you may as well eat sweets all day. Sweat pants are much more forgiving than bathing suits.

C made this:

B made this:

K made this:

Then we invited over the grandparents and Auntie KK to be the judges. C's cake won! Very dense chocolate and somehow we managed the conversion chart from french to english. B and K tied for second. Being the "mom", I would have somehow made them all tie, but those grandfathers can be brutally honest!

All in all, a delicious ending to the day!

Living the American Dream

We are taking a break this morning from "showing C, our french student, everything American in 3 weeks" and teaching her the blessed activity of hanging out in one's pjs and doing nothing. I am feeling a little guilty because I should be doing something, but trying to post and catch up on a few blogs was a little more important. Let's just call it my job and pretend I get paid for keeping you all amused.

C is a very sweet girl and always asking me if she can help. I think her parents gave her the notion that she was to be Cinderella in my home. Not true! Although having Cindi for a few weeks wouldn't be bad either. Anyway, we have gone to 2 days of my brother's bike ride, the beach a few times,

mini golfing,

go cart riding, Pizza Hut,

ice-cream, Water Wizz on a cold, cloudy day,

Target, the mall, Dunkin Donuts and Burger King. She has learned how to eat a meal in the car on the go, she has learned about donuts and thinks they are delicious and learned the same about bagels, and I am pretty sure she has a good grasp that my family is crazy. Poor girl. I really do wonder what is going on in her head.

I do know that at her house, the family sits down to a meal together and discusses books. I took 6 kids, (C and her sister I{she is staying with another family in Chatham}, my 2 girls and my 2 nephews) to WaterWizz, Friendly's, and Target. The main theme of discussion was pretty much anything that had to do with bodily excrements and bodily noises.

So, yes, now that I think about it, a day of rest is probably good for all. I have to gear up for the next 2 weeks of "how to live like an American".