Yesterday, after having my "girls" (and I mean the ones connected to me) aggressively manhandled by the mammography technician, I went to the mall. I went to look for birthday presents for B, my nephew and ideas for Christmas. And of course a little something for me to celebrate my squeezed boobies.
What I wasn't expecting to find was Santa and Christmas music playing in every store. Santa gave me a big wave, which was nice. He hasn't forgotten me or all the letters I have written to him over the years, but what was he doing so far away from home base before Thanksgiving? Call me old fashion, but I seriously don't think Santa should be at the mall until black Friday. The guy has a very busy month of December promoting Christmas. Can the elves be trusted to make all the toys in time? And who is checking "the list" twice? How is Mrs. Claus getting the turkey and it's fixins ready without the big guy? (Oh, wait a minute, women across the world manage quite well getting Thanksgiving dinner together without help from a big guy even when they are in the same room.)
I don't know if Santa or the Angels had anything to do with this, but I was wondering aimlessly around Macy's, actually looking for a dress for B that wouldn't make her look like a 9 year old Britney Spears, when I saw it. A very long, double sided rack of clothes, all sized correctly, separated by style and color with heavenly lights above it. The sign said, $9.99. with another 20% off. Seriously, I looked around to see if someone was videotaping me. There were beautiful things on this rack, that had never been marked down. I took 3 items over to the scanner because this was too good to be true, right? Nope, they all came up $9.99.
It was a Christmas miracle.
Maybe it was a good thing Santa was in the mall yesterday.
Please know I joke about mammograms, but have had them since I was 29. They are very important for women's health and if you are 35 and haven't had one yet, go see what you are missing! The new digital ones are not as bad as the old fashioned cave man ones.