Friday, February 20, 2009

Alone=Lonely?

Are you one of those people who can go out to a restaurant by him/herself?

Enjoy spending the whole day alone?

I am not. It hasn't taken me years to realize this, I have pretty much known it all along. I am definitely a people person. Although, I do like being alone when I go to the bathroom, but I am talking extended periods of time here. 

The girls are at the YMCA tonight at a special tween girls' night that includes swimming and a movie. It sounded fun to me, I almost wanted to stay. Since I am a good 25 minutes from home and have already driven up to Waltham and back today (2 hrs each way) I decided to stay put in Hyannis and wait the 2 1/2 hours to pick them up. I toyed with the idea of going to a rest. by myself and I couldn't do it. I ended up doing what I do best by myself and that is roaming the mall. Yup, me and the mall rats on a Friday night. Actually I only went to 2 stores and then made my way to Borders. 

This is my baby step. I ordered tea and am sitting at a table with my computer. I feel as though I am sitting with my friends, though. I have caught up on blogs and email and haven't really felt like I was 'alone'. I feel a smallish bit cool having a lap top and all. 

Maybe my next step will be going out for tea without my computer. (gasp). Maybe I will grow up by the time I am 60 and will be able to handle a dinner out by myself. (Nope, I can't even do breakfast or lunch at this point). 

Do you think there is a 12 step program for not enjoying your own company? Is this something I need to bring up with my therapist? Any comments?

11 comments:

Buford Betty said...

Too funny... I don't think you're *alone* in this... hahahha, Oh I crack myself up.

Actually I'm an only child, so I very much enjoy my alone time. I actually MUCH prefer to shop alone. I used to study a lot in Barnes & Noble in grad school, so no big deal there... but I do feel kinda funny eating at a restaurant by myself. No funny enough to not do it, but I feel like I need to have a book or a pad of paper or something... so I look "busy." Why is that? Like who cares? Funny to think about though!

Melisa with one S said...

OMG, I LOOOOOOOVE to be alone. Maybe you just need some practice.

Remember my big day in the city last summer? Alone. Heavenly!

Thoughts from the Deep End said...

I'm with you!
Small Doses!

WeaselMomma said...

Baby steps. With a good book or internet access, you can spend alone time anywhere!

Sue said...

BB, you cracked me up too.

Melisa, I was completely in awe of your day alone in the city last year. You have no idea.

Thank you Jackie and Barb!

Alone is sounding good this morning, since the girls are at each other already and it's only 8:30. Ugh.

J'Ollie Primitives said...

I was a single for manymany years. My choices were to get out of the house and go to a neighborhood bar or to dinner a.l.o.n.e. with no laptop OR stay home and drive myself nuts.
I went out. Once a week. It was really oddly fun after awhile.

AirmanMom said...

I get it! I was the oldest of 6 growing up, then at the ripe old age of 20 I gave birth to my first of four children...alone is not something I do well. It was only in the past year when my youngest enlisted in the Air Force...that I was forced to change my attitude of being alone and get to know me on a new level. It is all about baby steps! I keep a book with me, if I plan to be in public place by myself(it's my 'security blanket'). You'll be fine...one day.
P.S. 60 is way too young to have this alone stuff mastered!!!!
~AM

Mary Ellen said...

I used to be that way, but as I have aged, I find I enjoy being alone more and more. I have a lot going on in my head, so it gives me time to think all those big thoughts.

I love movies alone, shopping alone, and restaurants too, as long as I have reading material!

Wendi said...

I am not sure I understand.
Alone sounds like heaven to me!
Where can I get some?
Happy Weekend Sue!

k a t i e said...

I went to England alone for a trip to 'find myself' away from the hustle and bustle of all my friends and family.

All I learned was I hate being alone. I could never have gone out alone, to a movie or dinner - but now I've spent the past few months/years coming out of a shitty relationship with a complete moron, I'd much rather be alone than be in someones company I don't appreciate. I figure that's the first step to being able to enjoy my own company...one day I'll hit that movie theater alone!

angelsroy33 said...

I LOVE my alone time,but it took me til I was 38-years-old to be able to do it ALL totally alone. Long story,-and I won't subject you to it,-but I was forced to face my fear, and came out the better for it. Cliche,-I know, but oh-so-true-story for me,and I'm 100% stronger for it.