If I Had a Hammer...

I was at the YMCA one morning last week at 5:30 AM. (B swims that early some mornings. Just so you know, I will be that mom in the P&G ads where the athlete is thanking the mom for all that they do to help the kid succeed.)

So, I had to workout, otherwise, I would have fallen asleep in my car. I did the treadmill, the bike and then got on the floor to stretch and attempt a few crunches. As I was laying there staring at the ceiling, I noticed the nails.

What?

There were many nails sticking through the ceiling. This, of course, got me to thinking. What exactly were the builders thinking? I have hammered many a nail into a wall and when I hit "nothing" I knew it.  Were the builders hammering on the roofing tiles and knowing that they were hitting "nothing", just not caring? Did they think they were hitting insulation? I can see this happening once and a while, but there were a LOT of nails showing in the ceiling.

It's suppose to blow tomorrow up to 80mph. I hope someone in Hyannis does not get a bunch of roofing tiles in their yard for a Thanksgiving present.

My Invisible Shield Rocks

So, I am in a corner stretching and pretending I am invisible. My "fierce" (read: slow) 25 minute walk on the treadmill has netted me a loss of 87 calories and a chapter of the latest Danielle Steel novel.

My "brisk" walk on the treadmill is the result of starting to work out a month ago. In my head I am 27, but somehow my body has aged quicker than my head. I hurt my good knee walking too rigorously on the treadmill in week 2. That has really annoyed me but, of course, has not stopped my day-to-day activities. Activities that include hauling little kids around, cleaning the house and carrying 40 lb camera bags around wedding ceremonies.

So far at this gym, I have kept to myself. I hop on my favorite treadmill ( 3 from the wall with a view of the parking lot) and read a book. I guess I trained myself to read on a treadmill a long time ago to fight the immense boredom of it. I haven't braved the stretching/mat area because it is right in the middle of the gym. Who wants to see a 44 year old woman doing sit ups? Poor planning on the gym's part. Plus the high schoolers on the swim team are usually in this area. Have you ever gawked at high school swimmers before? Beautiful, in shape, non-flabby bodies. Not people I ever want to work out next to.

So I stretch far away against a wall, next to a scale that basically taunts me and very close to a leg machine. Not room to do situps, but an ok place to stretch and observe for a few minutes.

What I see is older people walking on the treadmill, in shape older men cruising on the step machine, sweaty people, laughing people  tatooed people, men with too much body hair, serious excercisers and the smiley lady that walks around and checks in with people. She's never checked in with me, though, probably because I have my invisible shield around me and she can't penetrate it.

One of the swim team moms, asked me to do a class with her because she noticed that I was working out in the gym (my shield must not have been working that day). This mom runs half marathons for fun. She must have mistaken the 'now me' for the 'best shape of my life college me'.

Hmm, if my invisible shield can alter people's perceptions of me, then maybe I can start doing those sit ups in the middle of the gym?

The Gym

I worked out with my parents today.

Yeah, let me give you the full picture. 

My Dad has always been a runner or walker, skier, does exercises every morning type of guy. My mom on the other hand has avoided exercise like it might give her the plague her entire life. Well, ok, there was a time that she skied when she and my Dad were dating, but I think that was just to hook my Dad. Then there was the time she played basketball for a day and sprained her finger and that was that. 

So, my little town has a community center and it has a cute little work out room in it. It is less than the cost of a pair of Uggs to join for the year. They joined yesterday and then said Happy early Birthday, we got you a membership too. 

We all went today, together, at the same time, in our Olivia Newton John headbands and thongs and got "Physical".
                                                                                                   What's with the fat guys in the picture?

I am allowed a little exaggeration, this is my story. They both hopped (that's a bit of a stretch) on the treadmills, so that left me with the eliptical. I have always been afraid of elipticals, but decided I had nothing to lose since we were the only ones in the gym. After the first 2 minutes of going backwards, I figured out how to go forward and actually didn't mind it. 

Then my Mom asks me if I want her to show me the machines and how to work them. OK, very cute, but I am a gym rat from way back when people lifted rocks and stones instead of sitting on a sweet machine. So as I was reintroducing myself to these muscle burners, a man walks in and announces that he is new. Well you would think my parents had been at the gym for a year the way they jumped in to help the man. My mom was attached to some tortorous device, but insisted on giving the man directions on how to turn the "new person DVD" on from across the room. My Dad got the guy a chair so he could sit and watch and learn how to "work the room". 

All and all a very fun time at the "gym". Hours later, my thighs are feeling a twinge of "hey, you did something to me today". We left the gym together and my Dad said that we ought to go 5 days a week and the look on my Mom's face was priceless.

 Too bad I didn't have my camera.